I am in my thirties and of course being a woman, at times my biological clock is ticking so loud I cant hear myself think. I am not unlike most women I want to get married and have a family and a white picket fence. There was someone in my life who at one time I had hoped to marry and start a family with but alas the fates did not see it that way. For a while this crushed me and I was very upset and did some crazy things in the name of “Unrequited Love.”
I think a lot of people walk into marriage with rose colored glasses on somehow thinking that life after they say “I DO” willl resemble an episode of the Cosby’s or Martin. Marriage is something you have to be in the right headspace for and I don’t think I was or am. I know so many women who seem to be in such a rush to to wear the dress that they make sacrifices and take shortcuts to get there. For example, I know a woman who got engaged to a man she had only known for a month. I know another woman who got engaged to a man that had recently broken up with an ex (like literally a few weeks later). I know another woman who was engaged and even after being presented with proof that her fiancee was cheating continued to hold on(if anything she clung tighter) to this idea of what marrage would be like. Needless to say none of these relationships lasted but I got to thinking about why.
I can only conclude that the reason must be that these women have problems with self esteem. Having problems with how they view themselves, these women clung to the hope that if they got married that that would somehow make all the problems in the relationship magically go away. As if marrage would somehow validate them as being worthy of love even though the marrage itself would have been loveless. I thought this too at one time that if so and so and I got married then I would be happy, and life would be better.
Like I said in my last post, we are all Humans and we all deep down want to feel connections with other people and want to feel loved. Walking into a marriage with low self worth or low self esteem is pointless. How can you ever love your partner enough to give them what they need from you if you can’t even give yourself what you need. We have to learn to be happy with ourselves and our own lives before we can intertwine them with someone else.
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” — Lucille Ball
“It’s time to give the gavel back to God, we were never meant to be judges.”
― Evinda Lepins
While going about my business online today and reading several different sites I sauntered across the site where a woman was talking about how there is a lack of good role models for young women in today society. At one point the writer made a comment regarding a woman on reality TV show and she basically said that the woman wasn’t fit to be a role model because she’s lived a life that the writer thought not to be appropriate or “Christian.”
Everyones is of course entitled to their own opinion however you don’t get to where the mantle of Christianity and sit there and judgment of people. The writer had no idea what struggles she overcame to get to the point where she is in her life. Instead the writer took at two minute clip of something woman said out of context and turned it into soapbox for her to supporrt her own self righteous inflated sense of self worth. This is a problem with the world today everybody tries to see things in black-and-white and just not that simple.
Not everyone is going to walk the same path.
Not everyone’s going to make the same choices because in the end it’s their lives and their choices.
Not everyone has had some closeted close minded upbringing
Not everyone was raised to believe the same thing as you and not everyone was raised feel the same way.
Therefore you can’t sit there and pigeonhole people into one category or another…life isn’t that simple. LIfe is hard and mean and bad things happen to good and bad people alike. As for myself I would rather have a role model who’s lived their lives, someone made a mistakes and pulled themselves back up and made something out of their lives; rather than someone who’s never took chances never done anything but live for other people but yet feels as if they somehow accomplished something or even worse someone who feels like they’re entitled to some form of respect. Get off your cross…put away your soapbox and stop it with the martyr bit…its tired.
Just A thought 😃😘😃
Before succumbing to the food coma or going out to fight with the crowds over an flat screen TV for 100 bucks. Or tuning in to whatever sporting event your into, let’s take a moment to think about the people and things that matter on your life.
This year I has been one of many personal revelations for me personally. I just want to take a moment to express how thankful I am to be alive and able to experience the roller-coaster that is life. I encourage everyone everywhere who might be going through something to just take a moment and realize how fortunate you are; and to remember it can always be worse…for instance you could have been born a turkey.
Just A Thought :) ♡♥♡ :)